Im Just Living Life

2008-08-20T20:56:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to say. About life, what I'm doing. Anything. My life is tremendously full of nothing and I can't tell the difference between "happy" and "sad". I Started school, and it's... school. very different this yr. though. Umm my family is psycho, and I'm.. falling apart. haha... Ummm... Cleo is still my best friend. and I love Jason more than ever. Kyle's moved away now... and it's really sad. everyone thinks I'm depressing. people don't like me. and I kinda am caring less and less daily about most people. But I'm caring more and more about others at the same time. I guess.. right now... Life's just... Confusing. and I'm trapped in the middle of... multiple situations.

Hmmm...

2008-07-31T10:08:00.000-07:00

I'm backkkkk... I haven't been on the computer much lately, as you can see, the only chance I've gotten i did more important things... then got off cuz i had like no time. anyways, Life has been kinda crazy lately, there's lots of things going on, and were all getting ready for the wedding... and kyle is leaving : ( I'm gonna miss kyle... he's like a ball of excitement. So today... I'm hopefully gonna find a cheap dress. cuz i have nothing to wear... for my aunts wedding. but if not.. i guess i can think of something else. Right now my sister is screaming because... i really don't know why actually but its kinda annoying. So life as of today is pretty good i guess, I'm a happy person. i came to find that people don't like me because I'm a bitch and everyone thinks that i hate them... My mom is going crazy now, and my dad has like no influence what so ever in my life anymore. i guess its just cuz... he doesn't care. I went to the mall with Beth and i smelled all the perfumes cuz i am trying to find one for Cleo cuz she wants perfume... but she thinks it all smells like old people. And hopefully Cleo is coming over tomorrow... I miss her. Aly is gone.. again. she's been gone all summer. but shes hopefully coming back today... but I'm gonna be busy so i probably wont see her till Monday, at the earliest. Oh, and my phone broke! again... phone number 2 down the drain. 2 of my phones broke within like a week or two. it was so lame! so.. i need a new phone. i can like... still use this one. but the screen is cracked and its totally lame. and the phone is a piece of crap anyway. And... my life needs excitement. so Cleo and I are trying to figure out things to do to keep our lives exciting... alright, i gotta go, cuz i need 2 get ready.

I need Reception.

2008-06-22T10:08:00.000-07:00

I'm house sitting! and it's totally boring! and i have nothing to do! and NO CELL SERVICE!!!!!!!!!!!!1 aaaahhhhhhh. I'm DYING. and I'm a lazy fat chunk of lard. well that's what i feel like. and i guess this is a good escape from home. but I'm completely and utterly bored and i want to see Jason. I'm missing 3 opportunities because I'm HOUSE SITTING IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE! YaY! and Cleo was gonna come but her mom said no, then said yes. and my Aunt said yes, and then said no... sooo uhhh yeah. it sucked. and now Cleo probably isn't coming over this week after i get back... and i am the saddest girl in California. i don't get to see my boyfriend, or my wife.YYYYYaaaaaaaaaaaYYYYYYYY. alright. well I'm getting paid for this m getting paid for this. and there's a pool, and lots of TV channels and a computer, and my own room and a whole house i can indulge in, no mom, a hummer, bunches of junk food and all the food i could want. but i guess this just proves materials don't matter as much as people do. alright so I'm totally bored out of my mind. and I'm gonna go make myself look alive. later.

Cleo Fay <3

2008-06-15T20:32:00.000-07:00

okay soooo the past like almost week i have been spending most of my life babysitting... and I've done a lot of thinking. and well, lets just start here... i am going to share my thoughts. alright so basically girls are stupid, that's obvious but right now what I'm just tired of is like backstabbing liars... and to be honest I've lost 4 friends in just this past school year and ummmm yeah pretty much people suck. especially girls. and, not to be conceited but i didn't lose any friendships because of my actions, i actually believe I'm a pretty good friend. so pretty much right now if someone decides at the spurr of the moment that they hate me now then screw it. there's other fish in the sea. and i don't mean that to sound mean, but i honestly don't care if I'm being offensive. and all of those who know me know that I'm not politically correct and i speak my mind, yet i don't just purposefully offend people or get them upset. one thing that really annoys me though is when people just sit around talking crap about me, cuz in my opinion when people do that either they are just totally bored and have nothing better to do than talk about people they hate because they are "so much cooler" they have to prove it. even though the person they are backstabbing is not even talking crap about them, so in my opinion I'd rater hang out with the other person! so like what the hell? does that make any sense to you??? okay so if they aren't bored then they are jealous, well if ur gonna talk crap about someone cuz ur jealous, they are already better than you, so basically u r calling yourself lesser than them, which you are saying all these terrible things about urself now, okay, okay, get a brain! alright, so ur not bored, and ur not jealous, whats left? YOU MUST HATE YOURSELF. alright so i have this burning passion of hate, and i really think I'm ugly, and stupid. I have a brilliant idea! lets nag on someone else! cuz that makes me feel sssooooo much better, right? alright so because you hate you, you now have to hate someone else to make ur hate for urself lesser? WHAT? are people just crazy???? this make NO SENSE whatsoever! how about we just blow up the world because were mad! c'mon people! alright, alright, so I'm done with that now... k. so like babysitting. i just started a new family of four, 2 boys and 2 girls, and they don't get disciplined, so pretty much they are the WORST kids to babysit. and I'm not getting paid a lot, i feel bad for this lady because she is a really sweet person, shes a young mom, her and her husband don't make very much money, and she has never really had a good babysitter. so the first time i babysat, all hell broke loose but i disciplined the kids when the didn't listen to me, so they respect me now and the best part is, the BEHAVE now and they LIKE me! like that is such a simple concept, discipline your kids, earn respect. like why don't parents do it then? maybe they are scared, or don't know how, i dunno. but anyways back to the job. so i was babysitting, then like i was also trying to pick up her house for her cuz she don't have very much time, so i was busy doing that. and her kids were all over the place, and i didn't eat all day, except 4 chicken nuggets cuz the only free-ish time i had was when i put a movie on and the watched it for 10 minutes without fighting... but i got over it, and then now its better and I'm fine. but that doesn't really matter... so yeah that's basically what I'm thinking about lately. And oh yeah, Cleo Fay is AWESOME! i have spent 3 days dedicating songs to her. and she to me, and i am in LOVE with that sexy beast.... haha. no, but shes awesome, and shes freaking amazing, so get over it! yeah... that's right.

Beer

2008-06-10T22:18:00.000-07:00

Alright... sooooo today was "Work Day" and it was AWESOME! yeah, i was hekka excited... anyway ssssoooo between the dead people, the coffin, the dirt, house cleaning and plant pulling i had a very exciting day! kinda... alright so i got up, went to the store, then i took a shower, moved an iron wood stove, and put some antique stuff inside a hutch shelve thingy... then we moved outside and i shoveled dirt from about 11 to 5 and we found a coffin full of dead people... not really. but it looked like it. and we also found a spoon and a spatula. and some chained rope. so then we transported dirt from one side of the "yard" to the other and cut bushes, then made a pathway with all the dirt we shoveled. and this was a LOT of dirt. then we pulled out plants from a big fat space so my mom could plant some herb bushes... and then we ate dinner at like 7 or 8 and then went back out and decided we will do the rest tomorrow so we took showers, got ready, and went to the store again! and... now I'm here. texting Cleo, at 10:32. and I'm tired. and i just drank a red bull and my sisters are L A Z Y. and i need 12 hundred dollars. i think i can get it... hopefully. and i need to be like 16... now. and i need clothes... oh yeah! i think i sprained my foot too. cuz like when we were digging dirt i tripped over this big stake in the ground and it tore up my shoe and now my foot is all swollen and painful and I've been walking on it all day. its awesome. and I'm going to babysit for like 5 hrs tomorrow. yay! and i cut myself with an eraser... did i tell u guys about that? it was most interesting. and now its just hurting.. kinda. and oh yeah! i went to San Fransisco, and i supposedly showed my "social side" and now I'm freaking awesome.. i dunno. yeah... okay, okay, Sharayah needs sleep now.

Justin Timberlake

2008-06-03T16:28:00.000-07:00

alright... so last weekend was based all around the relay for life and it was eventful! and i have had like no sleep in forever! wow! and not to mention on saturday night i had 3 energy drinks.. and some coffee.. and some hot chocolate and i was soooo hyper it was insane! and hilarious... cuz i annoyed myself. and im still sufferring from sleep deprivation. which is like ummmm... interesting. im so crazy lately like all my problems feel gone even though everything is like sucking. i feel like im on crack. but im still sober. hopefully. alright so for the past 2 days ive been at school for an extra 3-4 hrs and it sucks! and some random guy i dont even know asked me if i was like the loosers i was hanging out with and i said no then he said good, cuz your beautiful.. and it was totally awkward. then he showed me a picture of his son... and hes like 16. so it was like... disturbing. and im making dinner! and i had my last day of finals today. and im going to San Fransisco tomorrow. and im working ALLLLL weekend. yaaaaaayyyyyyy! Alright. I'm gonna go. laterrrr

Aly Orr : )

2008-05-28T14:53:00.000-07:00

okay so my eventful life continues as i figure out how crazy it really is. i uhhhhhh i just... don't know what to do anymore. like i decided that i hate girls. I'm in so many cat fights with stupid people and its driving me crazy! like all my best friends are gone (except Beth) and so now I'm just in the process of finding out who i trust again... and of course my boyfriend is amazing and like the only consistent best friend I've had... but i need my girl homies too. so like... I'm doing major trust tests with people cuz honestly I'm to nice to them and i just end up being stabbed in the back over, and over again. on a side note i was really happy today... then i came home. but i really was in a good mood, yet i don't know why. everyone at school was basically ticked off, i got no sleep last night as i was hurling out the 3 cups of coffee i was never supposed to drink and today i got in trouble for a dress code that was never enforced... and i found out i failed my history test! but i was in a great mood! until i came home. but whatever. okay soooo... today is the only day I'm not incredibly busy so i have to finish my history project today that's due Friday. but it should take forever... hopefully. alright so i decided i love Aly Orr. shes amazing, not to mention were engaged... which probably got the lesbians, bisexuals, and straights that all have crushes on me jealous, and she FINALLY took her pants off for me (totally kidding... but not really, but yes. and she was dressed. kinda like a inside joke) but anyway, shes awesome and like yeah... she's my new best friend. but that's kinda a given since we linked ourselves together... anyway. that was just my affection for Aly shared for a moment. but she really is hilarious, and you should meet her. we like rock hard together. like we have a fun together no matter what (not like that). alright so... sun chips are yummy. and i ate some today. and I'm gonna be fat. but i already am.. so whatever : ) alright... I'm gonna go before i get any more crazy then i already am. and oh yeah, i need dance lessons...

I can't stop loving you...

2008-05-27T19:15:00.000-07:00

alright, alright, so Sharayah is busy as hell for the next forever... and its amazing. not really, but whatever. i have no life. haha. i sound so cool. anyways, I'm like totally getting sick of the song "bleeding love" and commercials. i swear... every time i change the channel that's what i get. unless its a Spanish channel. then i just dot know what it is... which might actually be better i must confess. okay, okay, i lied. now its the goo goo dolls. alrighty, well i really have nothing to say,i did talk to lots of old people today, and i found out that erasers can like cut people open. and oh yeah, i have lots of crud i have to turn in by Friday so they can like get us more points before finals or something. i dunno. all i know is that i have a crap load of homework. along with being gone everyday. life's just crazy, but slowly school is ending along with life... so i guess everyone wins. alright I'm gonna close for today, ending with "Don't Go Chasing Waterfalls" and "A Thousand Miles". yay life.

Staples rock...

2008-05-24T21:30:00.000-07:00

okay, so my computer is gay and hekka slow.. and it sucks. anyways, the past couple weeks have been eventful, this past week i basically was gone a lot, and i did hekka homework and I've been super busy and life is just crazy! and i went to a wedding yesterday.. and its was awesome! and now i want to get married.. oh and Jason was there! and we got to dance! except i can dance to fast music... so i was terrible. but whatever. and then like i had Mexican food, and i love Mexican food. cuz Mexicans are awesome! and their food tastes good... and oh I'm doing the relay for life, that's next weekend, and two weeks ago i think i got like no 2 hrs or less sleep a night! it was insane! and i was gone.. the whole time. everyday i went somewhere and returned at like 9. then did HW.. that's why i didn't get sleep. cuz i was up until like 3 or 4 every night.. or maybe later. i don't know. and ummmmm dude. my sister is in LA and my cousin is in Hawaii. what the hell am i dong here? oh yeah, Jason is here. i have no where else i would want to go right now... except Jason's house. cuz that would be cool. and i have a staple! and its all straight and I'm playing with it. and it rocks. and i got a lizard! like a pet lizard! but my cat ate it... and my cat got black hair on my white blanket. what a jerk. I'm gonna shove her into the toilet and hope she flushes down. that would be amazing. and today i found out that I'm depressed, and have a high risk for committing suicide! isn't that great! it was like the most encouraging thing I've heard all week! oh yeah, and supposedly i might be bipolar, and my mom thinks that there's something wrong with me. and everyone asks me whats wrong all the time.. and don't believe me when i say "nothing" it makes no sense... i love those conversations... "whats wrong?" "nothing." "are you sure?" "yes." "well you seem upset, are you sure your okay?" "yes." "nothing is bothering you?" "no." "okay..." "thank you." that's like a conversation i have daily, if I'm lucky only once. its AWESOMEEEEEE. or i get told i look tired, which is also great, cuz then i just feel ugly. and if i am tired i can't even drink coffee! yay! alright.... ummm yeah. so that's life at this point...

Watermelons taste like summer...

2008-05-05T16:13:00.000-07:00

okay so.. I'm bored. and Beth wont answer her phone and i have to write an essay and i have to finish a yearbook assignment thingy... and i have to do some history homework which i don't know what it is... ill have to call Aly... anyways, i like don't feel like doing homework. i want to go run or something and then sleep and then read the bible or something like homework... no. but whatever. i hat a health final today. and it was hard, yet easy. but i hope i actually got a good grade on this one. otherwise I'm screwed. today... i ate cheez-its for lunch. and they were yummy. and my looser friends took them all. actually there's still more left. but yeah... i also drove a car, ran into a house and broke my leg... no. not really. but i though that would be interesting. I'm in a unique mood today. i feel like crap, and i totally just wish life would end. but I'm happy and hoping for more tomorrows. plus... I'm just ready for summer. my school sucks and i want to transfer next year... but i highly doubt that will ever happen. ummm and yeah i need money. like real bad. hopefully pretty soon i can go get my laptop.. i was going to this week... but I'm not sure now : (. alright.. I'm gonna do homework now.

I need to paint my nails...

2008-05-02T17:02:00.000-07:00

my phone is back...! woot : )the screen is still suffering from damage as well as the back cover. but its all working properly... I'm totally bored out of my mind and i feel like dying. but i have like hekka homework i could be doing... but instead I'm surfing youtube. anywaysssss. um i have like nothing to say. my life is so dull and boring. i need money : ( I'm so poor... and my grades dropped again.. but i don't really know why.. my teachers are just losers. and i need to transfer schools after this year... but i cant... whatever. I'll live i guess. i need to do something today and tomorrow. i feel so empty... i have to do like hours of homework and stuffs though. so i guess I'm just going to overwhelm myself in that.. YAY! and I've had the song "Man, I Feel Like A Woman" by Shania Twain stuck in my head since yesterday... and its amazing. and POM tea is like the greatest tea ever invented.. not to mention the containers are pretty freaking sweet. and i lost my stapler. but life goes on. Sharayah is feeling cynical today.. well just right now. earlier i was in like a really good mood... whatever. Kay I'm done now.. laterz.

YAY!

2008-04-30T17:08:00.000-07:00

okay... so my phone is drowned in water. I'm airing it out right now. i had to totally take it apart.. hopefully its not busted or my dad will kill me.. and oh yeah! my English teacher assigned us an essay and a play that we have to perform, write, get costumes, masks, and other junk and the best part is... ITS ALL DUE FRIDAY! yay! so I'll be busy with that along with the rest of my hectic life... i love it! oh my goshes.. life is fantastic! it took me like forever to find something to unscrew my phone too. i had to find a way to break into my dads office and get a circular thingy (i don't know what that tool is called)and i cant wait to just go spend the rest of my life on homework.. cuz i don't have anything better to do... i think i have a current events due tomorrow or the day after.. I'm not sure. but my history teacher doesn't tell me anything... so i really wouldn't know. and I've been taking a biology test the past few days... so I've had no homework in there but I'm sure by tomorrow she'll pile it on... and i have a few math problems. but its not bad. i really need some energy drinks. or lots of coffee. but mostly energy drinks. I'm like not so much in a good mood today... so sorry about that. i was a total bitch to my sister today... and i like never see her. i felt bad. alright. I'm gonna go now.. i think i should like write my essay. laterz.

WHOA <3

2008-04-29T14:14:00.000-07:00

Alright so I am at home, BORED, like always... yesterday i went over to Natalie's house and did stuff... we hung out till like 7. then I came home and people were over.. and I just chilled and talked to Beth on the phone. Today I went to school, got a notice for 10 hrs. of detention for missing school on Friday, so I had to clear all that crap up.. and tonight I'm babysitting! yay! i haven't babysat in a while.. so I'm excited. and I'm getting my laptop hopefully the end of this week or next week... ordering it anyway... and then I'm getting it... whenever it comes. ANYWAYS i didn't eat today.. cuz i didn't feel good but i was so starving so i ate when i came home and now i feel like I'm just gonna puke.. so i should have never stuck anything down my throat.. and i like didn't even eat very much. but whatever... life sucks. and ummm hmmm I got 2 dresses for the next 2 weddings I'm going to... i just need to find a way to purchase some shoes... and now after i get my laptop i need to come up with $200 to get some contacts. then i need like another $400 to get clothes, shoes, basic necessities, and what not. so pretty much the biggest thing holding me back is the lack of money. Life is pretty much boring currently, but I'm really busy. i think the only day this week I'm not doing anything other than school is... tomorrow. And my weekend is jammed too. I'm hoping for no homework.. like that will ever happen... no sleep is in my future! i gotta go clean the kitchen... and some mexican lady just called...

This one may bore you

2008-04-22T16:41:00.000-07:00

Toay sucked, it was totally boring... and ummm yeah. i did eat a yummy froxen lemonade thingy though. and it reminded me of my eighth grade exsperience. its kinda raining right now. and im going to bible study later tonight. and testing sucks. and its hekka easy! so yeah! thats my life so far... sorry this one is so boring : ( dude.. i miss jason...

2008-04-21T19:09:00.000-07:00

Okkkaaaaayyyyyyy. so, today i did STAR testing! YYYYYAAAAAAYYYYYY! yeah, not so much. but whatever! I have like no HW though. so thats good. but umm ive been kinda just hangin. and im getting fat! aaahhhhhhh! yeah... life actually isnt exciting. more like totally sucky and boring. so i have nothing to say! isnt that awesome? i saw Jason yesterday... and it already feels like yesterday was 3 years ago. okay. thats it. sharayah is bored. oooohhhh wait! i do have something to say! haha. okay so after school i came home and my sister as standing outside with my mom and i kinda knew what was going on but not really.... so i asked, and they said that they had just called the cops cuz my sister was home alone and saw some wackos trying to get into our house. well, it turned out that they didn't actually do anything, but they freaked her out, roamed around my dads office and our yard and tried to break into our house.. before they saw my sister. my sister, panicked, home alone, called my other sister in roseville.. haha. but anyways, the police said they cant even go near our house or they will be in trouble... and we can call them. : ) lol...

Crazy Crazy

2008-04-18T22:52:00.000-07:00

okay so today i had no school... and i figured a relaxing, mellow day, right? not so much in Sharayah's world... okay so i woke up, got ready and went to get my glasses (i can finally see) then when i got home i cleaned, organized, and did homework... then i had to go to a dead old ladies house with my dad, mom, and uncle. we moved so much furniture i think my arms are going to fall off. I'm not even kidding. then i had to assemble it all (yay!). it was wonderful. so Ive been moving stuff all day and I'm hekka tired and I'm getting fat and i look like a dork. so yeah.. life is good... i honestly don't remember the last time i actually had nothing to do. life is just hectic in Sharayah's wonderful magical world... okay i gotta go move more stuff.

2008-04-17T14:28:00.000-07:00

YAYYYYY! my Internet works! in case you all were wondering.. i haven't posted for a while because my Internet was broken... i know, i know, i always have a new excuse huh? well anyways.... life sucks. again. i have a little bit of peace and joyousness for a couple days... but now its back to crap. and yeah... i wont really go much into that. and i found out that my brother is going to the Iraq war. and ummm my mom is being a meanie head. and i have no life and my teacher suck and i need to talk to Jason!!!!!!!! but i get to see him tonight : ) so yeah.. I'm a little happier. dang. i need my glasses. I'm DYYYIIIINNNNNNGGGGG. but who cares right? alright so I'm hekka bored right now listening to music and ummm yeah. i have no school tomorrow!!!! yay! and i get to see Jason Sunday... more excitement! yeah then the rest sucks. k I'm done now.. i have nothing good to say. laterrrr.

Random blog for today...

2008-04-08T13:46:00.000-07:00

haha okayyyyy, so apparently i wasn't "back in action" but whatever... ummm so the past week or so have blown pretty much... i like haven't seen Jason at all : ( and i sprained my foot... i think... and i failed my past 4 tests.. haha. its amazing. but school is going okay. we had a field trip and then after Aly's mom took Morgin and her mom, Aly and I to the mall and we had lunch and went shopping and stuff. that was funnn. and ummm my mouth still hurts. and i have to syringe it. life sucks! ummmm but i have text messaging back. so I'm happy... partially. i am hopefully getting my laptop by like the end of this month... if i can babysit at least once or twice more... and ummm then I'm saving up for a whole load of crap. its gonna be fun. i need to drive. danggggg. anyways ummm, i cleaned my bedroom last night and did some awesome homework and i wasn't gonna sleep at all... but Jason told me to so i got like 3-4 hrs. or else i woulda cleaned more stuffs up in my bedroom. school was interesting today though... and Aly got me gum for all the gum shes taken this yr (I think she gave me more than that though.... Cleo on the other hand has had like at least 5 packs herself.) it was funny, she didn't let me open it until biology... and it had this hilarious card in it... so yeah, that was my fun of the day and i didn't get caught even once for texting in class. haha... my teachers are lameos.

Back in Action!!!!

2008-03-30T20:33:00.000-07:00

OKaaaaaayyyyyy, so, i haven't writing anything in DAYZ so.. i apologize. unless of course, you don't care. alright so, on Thursday i cleaned my house! and ummmmm, i went to bible study AND I SAW JASON! but i looked hilarious cuz i was still puffy (and still am!) okay... so Friday sucked. i just cleaned my house... But i had a hamburger!!!! it was soooo good. and it was the first day my teeth could touch each other! haha... Saturday i went to a baby shower, then i went with my mom to this old Lady's house and i went to the store down the street and bought food and i talked to Beth on the phone... and i talked to Jason. Sunday Jason wasn't at church cuz hes at his mom's House and it was sad. so i bothered mark and Naomi (my sister and this guy she likes) and i talked to Jason's cousins (Carlie and JJ) and ummmm yeah then today i went to school. YYYYAAAAAYYYYYYY! yeah.. not so much. but i went to health class and took an exam! it was amazing! and Aly, Nicole and I read our literature story with total enthusiasm and made fun of it (and we were talking RRREEEEEAAAAALLLLYYYYY loud and got many weird looks.. haha) then Aly and I did a little swing dancing. then i took my sister to the dentist... now I'm home.. talking to Beth.. waiting for Jason. okay. Byeeeee!

Finally some relaxation...

2008-03-26T16:35:00.000-07:00

So today i was in lots of pain.. but it was relaxing. I've been resting, doing homework and all that fun stuff, I'm starving and i can eat soup.. the the only soup i can eat isn't very filling. but tomorrow i can eat! like real food! but i have to cut it up it real real small pieces... i feel like a baby. haha and i have ice covering my face. but tomorrow no more ice either! and i get to see Jason tomorrow.. hopefully... but i don't have much to say today. it was kinda just a lay low type day for me. but my parents are meanies. especially when I'm not in a good mood. and health is weird... they put interesting stuff and pictures in my book...

I got my teeth pulled : (

2008-03-25T23:15:00.001-07:00

okay I'm sure you don't want to hear me rant about how i got all four wisdom teeth dug out of my mouth but I'm going to tell you anyway. and if you really don't want to know.. just skip this one : ) haha. alright. so at like 1:30 i went in to get my teeth pulled, and they didn't knock my out all the way, so i heard things. but i couldn't feel anything cuz i was real numb. anyways, so when i was done i had hekka ice on me and the swelling went down and it wasn't numb no mores so it started hurting... and my vicodine didn't work. so i had to take ibuprofen with it and it helped better, but im still in pain and i have ice all around me face. its amazing. yeah not really, so I'm starving but i cant really eat anything. tomorrow i can eat soup though! yay! but i do have to rinse my mouth with salt water... yuck. its horrible though! cuz ppl keep making fun of me. well... my parents and my grandma. the bleeding stopped pretty fast so that was good. and i think I'm doing pretty well. when i got back to my grandmas i put my head upside-down to put my hair up and it felt weird and i was laughing for like 10 minutes straight. and i couldn't stop. cuz i wa still kinda drugged. it was crazy. and kinda funny... i thought so. anywayssss, I'm supposed to be resting. but i can't. i feel alive. haha kay i gotta go brush my teeth...

You may be bored this time...

2008-03-24T22:57:00.001-07:00

alright. so uhhh today um i didn't really do much at all. i went to the eye doctor around 10 and my eyes got dilated and i got like the cutest glasses (and i HATE glasses.. haha) anyway, so when we were done we went to the northridge cafe in Penn Valley and then we stopped at my grandmas and kyle was there : ) then i went to health class... and it was boring and i couldn't see (my eyes were still dilated) but i saw my homies.. so it was good. then i came home and talked on the phone and picked up around the house. then i went to get my prescription for penicillin and vicodine and now I'm just waiting for tomorrow. and i miss Jason... : ( yep that's pretty much it. life is boring right now. not to bad, not good. but im still alive!

Easter...

2008-03-23T21:33:00.000-07:00

Alright. so today was good! I love good days. and I'm going crazy! wwhhhhaaaalllllaaaaaa. so today i woke up and i couldn't find anything to wear cuz i didn't feel like i looked good in anything and it sucked. so i put on a tank top and some jeans... haha Easter clothes.. yeah right. so yeah... that was interesting. and then i saw Jason at Church. and i coulda won 20 bucks with a bet.. but i decided not to bet him... so anyway seeing Jason was the best part of the day... then we went to my cousin's aunts house.. i dunno my like aunt once removed or something? freakin i dunno. wait... shes my cousin. i got it. alright so we went to my cousins house and me and my best friend/cousin Beth wandered around Alta Sierra (and i got to talk to Jason on the phone! haha...) so... we had some interesting conversations that no one wants to know about. but it was good. and my shoe broke (Beth) and so i was walking barefoot. so then i started doing cartwheels and round-offs and it was freakin amazing! but I'm sad that i cant do like back flips and stuff still.. but whatever. so we hung out there for a while and i worked out all the crap i ate. now I'm home and I'm bored and i love Jason! haha. yeah.... and ants suck. they really do. and i just cut my foot on a piece of glass. awesome. alrighty... laterz....

A little excitement into my world...

2008-03-22T22:23:00.000-07:00

alright. wow. today was one of a kind! well yesterday actually (since i didn't post anything) i had no school, i cleaned up my house, then spent about 3-4 hrs down town with one of my besties... that was fun! and we have some hilarious pictures and videos.. but that's a story in itself. so then i went to go babysit my favorite kids and we had fun, the tackled me of course.. but we did Easter stuff and they had fun.. and i got paid good. so yeah... alright so, today i went to a birthday party for a 90 yr old lady my mom works for and then we went to the church a few hrs later and i saw Jason... (YAY!!!!!) and so i was happy. and my dad stayed at the birthday party... don't ask me why... so i chilled with Jason and then we left to get my dad. yeah he was drunk. and it was hilarious. he was arguing with this guy and then a few min. later they were hugging and saying how much they loved each other... then we were leaving and my dad wanted to say goodbye to his newly found boyfriend and he tripped on a latter and cut part of his eyelid and he was bleeding everywhere... but my dad was an entertainment in itself. while we were waiting Naomi and i went to the store to get food and then we ended up getting free ice cream.... and so we started eating and stuff back at the house... alright so we finally got my dad in the car now him and my mom are at the emergency room and hes getting stitches.. and still planning on going to Church tomorrow... alright so that was the very short summary of the past two days. very eventful. now I'm just waiting for my parents to return....

Spring Break

2008-03-20T19:42:00.000-07:00

Alright its spring break for high school. good right? not so much... yeah i have a week off school, but not really. i have collage classes still, but I'm only taking one currently so that's not to bad... but the day after Easter i have an eye doctor appointment, then i have to get my wisdom teeth pulled on Tuesday. all four of them. so that's gonna suck. and tomorrow i am full all day cuz i have a appointment with the surgeon... then I'm babysitting for the rest of the day. but i am possibly hanging out with my bestest friend. so that should be fun. we only get like 3 hrs though... anyway, i still have homework. and i don't understand my math at all. does anybody know how to do quadratics??? in confused and my parents don't know... haha but I'm still gonna try to jam pack my social life because its break. and i really need one... but I'm glad ill be away from that place.. even though it is amusing... and ill miss my homies. but it should be nice to get a little stress off of me. alright so life is getting suckier again and i haven't talked to Jason for 2 days so that's sad.. and SPD didn't have combos! i almost died! but that's not the bad part.. lol.. but i do love combos. anywayssss. so basically i don't really get a spring break.. and the days I'm not doing anything.. ill be syringing my mouth and trying my best to eat yogurt. I'm actually probably not even going to eat until the stitches dissolve and I'm completely healed and off my vicodine. its going to be fun. alright. so I'm bored and i need to figure out my homework... and I'm drinking Chi tea and its yummy. school was lame and mr. mullennax sucks. and that's all my thoughts for now....

Just some thoughts

2008-03-19T19:40:00.000-07:00

Alrighty... so i really cant explain whats going in my head... life is just confusing. i don't know if its getting better. or if I'm just so used to it sucking that I'm not sure... anyway, i cant seem to find anything that improved. but I'm trying. alright lets talk about my school. so i go to Ghidotti. its an early collage high school and I'm attending it at sierra collage. no, I'm not like SUPER smart or anything. i just take collage prep classes and take collage while in high school. okay anyway, everyone thinks that its a "good school" but really, its full of drugs and homosexuals (hence the name Gaydotti) anyway, the teachers are horrible. except the math teacher. i like him... so I'm basically always overwhelmed in homework and we have homework from the collage and all that fun stuff. what i don't get is that they give us extra homework... and we take collage. it doesn't make much sense... but w/e its do-able. k. so when i say its full of "druggies" that is no judgment on people, i totally am around people who use drugs. but for some reason people get surprised that people actually do drugs at a quote "smart people school" I'm just simply stating that drugs are everywhere, and honestly i don't want to deal with it along with everything else i have to put up with. and i don't hate gay people, i may not agree with them at times, but I'm totally cool with it. I'm straight and i believe that's the way humans were made to be (hmmmm... maybe that's why the same sex cant get each other pregnant...???) anyway, i don't mind anyone different from me. every ones welcome in my world. i got every kind of friend out there... so yeah. ummm aside from school just people and family in general seem to have a problem with me and i don't know what I'm doing wrong.. like if i could figure that out it would be awesome. but course nothing goes the way you want it to... everyone has let me down, and I'm sure I've done the same, but i can get past it, life goes on. that's not my issue, honestly i don't know what my issue is. or other peoples. i know for a fact i am judged by my outward appearance which just makes me all together mad. when people judge me for what I'm not it really ticks me off. and its not like i go around parading how amazing i am, because that not right. and honestly i'm not amazing. i just want people to know who i am by me, not what they hear or see. and i just want to be know for me... and nothing more.

About Me

2008-03-18T21:29:00.000-07:00

Hello, My name is Sharayah... i decided to make this because my friend got one... and i always wanted to do something like this... so here i am. I've never had a perfect life, but then again... who has? I'm not what people typically expect me to be. I've been called every label in the book but still... nothing will ever fit me. i love to write poetry. its my escape from whatever is dragging behind me. i have the mostest wonderful boyfriend evers and I've realized i never really had anything until him. i am a christian girl and i have been for quite a few years now. and no i will not shove bible down your throat or force you into a religion... and the funny thing is. i don't practice a religion, the biggest part of Christianity is faith and a relationship. that's it. i don't have the best life. but there's people out there a lot farther off. i try to live life to its best.. but it doesn't always work. i just do the best i can... k. i will try to post something daily to keep updates... for whoever wants one... if anyone. alright. laterz.